Life is a bowl of cherries, pits included!  These pits represent emotional pain from our past.  Do you have lingering hurts that reveal themselves on occasion?  If so, make peace with your past and release what keeps you from living life fully.  Resolve to heal old wounds so that you can focus on what is really important: your health and enjoying the beauty of life’s moments.

Emotional pain from our past is like an open wound.  They continue to hurt until conscious mending takes place.  Some wounds are large and deep, seemingly resistant to healing but that is only a perception.  All wounds can be healed with proper attention and care.

Take responsibility for healing your past hurts.  This can be done through regular journaling, meditation, time spent with a compassionate confidante, a trusted professional or a suitable support group.  Choose one or any combination that works for you.  Healing comes when you honour yourself, your hurts and release what imprisons you.  Gradually, old hurts shrink until there is nothing left but a small scar.  The wound is closed and we return to a healed state as we all began.  Make peace with your past and free yourself from yesterday’s hurts.  Peace gives way to increased positive experiences, a key component of aging well.

The last workshop: “AHA! Attitudes for Healthy Aging” was a phenomenal success!  Nine participants, ranging between 40 and 70 years of age, emulated aging well in an evening of dynamic discussions and engaging small group activities.  Participants practiced visualization, relaxation and creative teamwork in collaborating a community quilt made out of paper that illustrated 4 vital components of aging well.  One senior participant stated the workshop encapsulated numerous key points in a way that she had never seen before.  She was very pleased with the entire session and wrote a raving view that can be seen on the testimonial page of this website.  She summed it up beautifully, stating that the workshop “crystallized her thoughts” on healthy aging!

If you missed last Monday’s workshop, you will have another chance to experience it with added bonuses.  An extra 30 minutes  has been added along with bonus topics including strategies for facing fears, coping with unknowns and designing meaningful legacies.  This workshop will be held on Wednesday morning, April 3, 2013 from 9:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m. at Glen Pine Pavilion.  The cost is $35+tax.  Register on-line at coquitlam.ca/registration , phone 604-927-4FUN (4386), or visit Glen Pine Pavilion in person at 1200 Glen Pine Court.  Note: You do not have to be a member or 50 years old to attend. Register early to avoid disappointment!

Healthy, supportive relationships are worth their weight in gold.  Nothing beats a good friend, confidante or support person to help you rebound from life’s challenges in a timely manner.  Supportive relationships are something like a safety net; catching you when you fall, preventing excess harm and allowing you to continue through life in good spirits.

The older we get in life, the greater the likelihood of significant challenges.  Loss of peers and loved ones along with declining physical abilities take their toll, regardless how prepared one is in life.  Having support people to journey alongside helps to normalize our experiences and put them into perspective.

If you feel you don’t have an adequate support system, start building one today.  Join clubs or groups, volunteer for causes you are passionate about, or simply drop into your local community centre and participate in one of many activities they offer.  Just as you are having fun, your network of relationships will grow like magic!

Aim for a variety of friendships, from various cultures and age groups.  We can learn a lot from others in older and younger generations, not to mention be inspired.  Younger friends can be enlivening while older friends can be fabulous role models that offer insight to the realities of aging in today’s world.  Have fun building relationships and remember, face-to-face relationships are the most fulfilling and beat on-line relationships any day!

“Aging is not for sissies.”  Actress Bette Davis coined this phrase many years ago and I believe she is right.  Ask any elder in their 80’s, 90’s or beyond and I am sure they will agree as well.  Aging brings you face to face with major challenges in life.  Are you ready?

If not, there is no better time than right now to start preparing for the road ahead.  Take some time to assess your current place in life to find out where you might begin to make some changes.  Ask yourself the following questions:

• “Are my relationships satisfying and supportive?”
• “Have I made peace with my past?”
• “Do I take good care of myself?”
• “Do my work and leisure activities bring me joy and happiness?”
• “Am I where I want to be?”

Having a solid base is necessary for enduring life’s ups and downs.  Healthy aging does not just happen.  It requires focus, dedication and commitment to create the future you desire.

Take one giant step towards healthy aging today and register for next Monday’s workshop: AHA!  Attitudes for Healthy Aging.  Embrace a proactive approach that supports good choices for years to come.  In the forthcoming posts, I will be discussing the significance of each of the five questions listed above as they relate to healthy aging.  Until then, take good care and I hope to see you on Monday evening.

Aging well is a challenge in today’s youth-oriented culture.  Anti-aging campaigns make the process more difficult by masking the realities and denying the truths.  Not long ago, elders were revered members of society that the younger generation looked up to.  Today, old age is viewed as something less than desirable.  The truth is, aging is a honour that some do not have the privilege of experiencing.

Healthy aging is a humbling art.  Aging brings us face to face with many of life’s most difficult experiences.  Change and loss are common at many levels and developing the necessary coping skills are important to aging well.   Healthy aging is possible for everyone and it all begins with you and your commitment to wellness.

There is no time better than now to prepare for the years ahead.  Sign up for Mind Master’s newest workshop: “AHA! Attitudes for Healthy Aging”.  Join rich discussions that will inspire confidence and inner peace for the road ahead.  Gain insight on the essential attitudes for success and discover the keys to lasting vitality.  Create your own personalized plan for success and watch the wonders unfold before you!

This workshop is specially priced at $30+HST.  It will be held in room C1002, 7 – 9 pm on Monday evening, March 18, 2013 at the Coquitlam campus of Douglas College, 1250 Pinetree Way.

Fear is a perception.  Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real.  We all have the power to rid ourselves of fear.  Gently nudge yourself through fear using the same compassion and patience you would use with a child.  Find that tender voice within you that en-COURAGE-s you to take small steps forward.

Dedicate yourself to your mission.  Commit to personal growth and consider the benefits of stretching yourself beyond your comfort level.  Ask yourself, “What do I have to gain?”  You might make a new friend, discover a new passion or activity you never tried before.  When you allow yourself to move forward in life, you open yourself to experiencing more in life.  There are boundless opportunities awaiting you.  Vow not to let fear hold you back from being all that you were meant to be.

The opposite of trust is distrust.  Fear breeds distrust.  Cast a light on fear and it will gradually diminish.  The longer the light shines on it, the smaller the fear will be until eventually it gives way to a healthy sense of trust.  In the last post, I discussed one way of building trust and that is to increase awareness of limiting beliefs.  Once we develop that awareness, we can start to break down our fears.

For example, if you fear insufficient sources of organically grown foods, you might initiate dialogue with others in your community on reliable sources and then begin to research them one by one.  As you build awareness of the “who, what, where and hows” of  trusted suppliers, you might become inspired to experiment with your own home garden.  There are few things more rewarding in life than growing your own food and enjoying the harvests of your labour.  It is a win-win since not only does your health benefit, your friends and neighbours benefit if you have a bumper crop and the world benefits with increased sustainability.  Cast a light on fear and be open to the surprises that unfold as you grow through living!

Trust is an important part of healthy living.  When we trust ourselves, others and the world around us, we are able to live fully in the moment and appreciate all aspects of our life.  We accept it without conditions and surrender to the moment with a wonderful sense of peace and contentment.

How do we get to this place of peace?  We begin by assessing our current level of trust.  Ask yourself the following questions and answer them as honestly as you can.  What are my current thoughts about myself, important relationships, my work and the world in general?  Begin with “I feel . . . ” and complete the sentence for each area.  You may want to discuss it with a close friend or even write a story from your current perspective.  If you choose to write, allow your thoughts to flow freely on paper unedited.  Don’t worry about grammar or punctuation, just write to get clarity and uncover your truths.

Review your story objectively and look for positive and negative words or statements that reflect your level of trust.  Read your written words as if you were your own best friend providing objective feedback .  If you find your level of trust is low in any of the areas, consider why it is low, what beliefs support this and who may have influenced this view of yours.

As you complete this exercise, look back to the last two posts titled ‘Testing your Beliefs‘ (revised 2/8/13) and ‘Dualistic Thinking‘.  Envision many doors and viewpoints available for you to explore.  Know that building trust begins with you and open awareness of possibilities.  Free your mind of limited thinking and trust the best is yet to come.  You will be glad you did!

We make choices everyday.  Sometimes we believe there are only two choices to make: the right one or the wrong one, the good one or the bad one.  This type of black and white thinking is called dualistic thinking.  It involves limited thinking though since it ignores the vast grey area of options in between.  Dualistic thinking makes life more difficult as there is no room for compromise or negotiating alternatives.

Dualistic thinking can be detrimental to relationships since it offers only two doors to choose from.  The remaining doors are not visible as they are obscured by a narrow focus.  Try to keep this vision in your mind the next time you feel there are limited choices.  Relax your mind, envision the other doors with alternate solutions.  Ask yourself what is behind each door and which doors offer the best solutions.  Open your mind to the possibilities that exist and seek a win-win with every decision you make!

Beliefs are unique to each person.  Where did they come from?  Many are derived from authoritative figures in childhood such as family members, teachers and influential people in our community.  As impressionable young children, we take on beliefs without question and live by them until we see otherwise.

Fast forward to today as fully grown adults, we would all benefit from testing these old beliefs to see if they are true or not.  Often they are not.  For example, if a parent or teacher criticized our work in a harsh way, we may hold the belief that we are poor writers, bad artists, or incapable problem solvers, etc.  Be open to testing these old beliefs and creating a new and evolved you!  In the next few post, discover how limited thinking impacts all of our relationships and experiences in life.