Forgiveness nurtures a generous and loving spirit. The third way that forgiveness can be expressed is by forgiving others who have hurt you. Remember that being human means making mistakes. We are prone to errors. We must be willing to let go of resentments and disappointments in life in order to fully free ourselves from past pains. Holding victim mentality and a sense of betrayal serves no one. It is far more beneficial to release these negative habits and allow an open heart to come forth. The rewards are immense as your inherent gifts awaits discovery!

Last weeks’ post introduced the first of three ways forgiveness can happen. Forgiving oneself is key to living fully and freely, aligned with one’s true potential in life. The second way involves requesting forgiveness from those that we have consciously or unconsciously hurt. It is essential to acknowledge that mistakes are a natural and normal part of the human experience. We learn through our mistakes and grow through them when we acknowledge the harm that was done, commit to doing the necessary reparation work and also commit to not repeating the mistake again.

Reparation may involve meeting the other person, separation, writing a letter, individual or group therapy, bodywork, and even meaningful volunteer activities that uplift one’s sense of self-worth. Shifting to generosity and goodwill in the community is tremendously powerful and healing, allowing revitalization of one’s essential spirit!

Forgiveness is a learned skill that involves commitment and regular practice. It is a life skill essential for overall wellness and thriving of our human species. Holding resentment, anger and grudges limits not only our ability to live life fully but also live life freely. Releasing negative energy is key to discovering our true nature.

Forgiveness can happen in three ways. The first way involves forgiving yourself for allowing suffering in your life, for neglecting self-care and for participating in perceived limitations. Ultimately you always have a choice in life, to either live freely with love or limited in anger and fear. Choosing self-love is actually a selfless act since everyone you come into contact with benefits greatly from your loving energy!  This is the true essence of who you are!

Humans are relational beings by nature and thrive through meaningful connections and acts of kindness and altruism. Conversely, troubled relationships bring pain and harm to all. At a subconscious level, all humans are impacted by wars and disasters in the world. Just as we do not hurt alone, we also do not heal alone. Connecting with others in a meaningful way helps to rebuild and heal interpersonal relationships in life. Connection is key!

Which connections require healing and reparation in your life? What can you do today to begin the process? Perhaps it is simply acknowledging the hurt that has happened and allowing emotions to surface. Repressed emotions inhibit wellness in significant ways. Free yourself from yesterdays hurts so that you can live fully today. Forgiveness starts when you are ready to walk the path of peace. Next weeks post will address key ideas and practices that aid the forgiveness journey!

Popular author and international speaker, Dr. Wayne Dyer (1940-2015) wrote an eye-opening book titled “Change your thoughts, change your life.”  This self-help book offers expansive ideas and practices to transform one’s life in positive ways. Another way that transformation can happen is by embracing the famous quote by Mahatma Gandhi (1869 – 1948), “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.”  As we embark on 2018, make time to consider the changes you would like to see in your life as well as the changes you would like to see in our world. Reflect upon the legacy you would like to leave for future generations and what you can do this year to make it a reality!

The fourth noble truth emphasizes that the path toward greater ease and peace is found through wisdom, ethics and meditation. Wisdom involves our most healthy perspectives with intentions aligned for the greater good. Ethics involves morally right decisions and actions while meditation involves focused concentration into our deepest, most heartfelt truths. Together they bring us home to our most authentic self,  with understanding and unconditional acceptance in all areas of our life.

The third noble truth is that ease and peace of mind are always available. When we detach from the dramas of mental chatter and land in the moment, we can observe what is actually happening. We can tap into our physical body sensations and shift our experience creating an immediate transformation. Letting go fear, judgement, anxiety, and worrisome thoughts, we come to see the reality of the moment. Stillness of mind can be likened to a vast blue sky, with openness, wonder and curiosity, moment by moment. Envison the sky when you are caught in the troubles of daily life. Perceive its expansiveness and limitless beauty. Experience it as if it is the very first time in your life! This is where ease and peace of mind reside.

The second noble truth reveals that life is painful or difficult because of our attachments. When we stick to certain ideals of what life ‘should’ be like, we create pain for ourselves. The incongruency between our mind and the reality of the moment brings added tension. Instead of accepting what is actually happening, there is resistance which results in stress, strain and struggle. Surrendering to the flow of life is essential in order to experience more peace in life.

For instance, if you believe your children should not argue, you can fume in frustration or accept what is happening and collaborate a solution that yields win-win outcomes. Or if you expect yourself to be emotionally stable during a family meeting and anger arises, you can push away the pain or excuse yourself and allow time to release your pain in an appropriate manner that serves the greater good. The choice is always there.

Eastern wisdom reveals an all-encompassing perspective of the human journey. This view involves four noble truths which help to ease suffering and enhance peace of mind. The first noble truth is that life inevitably includes suffering and difficulty. Anytime we resist difficulties in life, we create discord within leading to imbalance and added tension. As a result, we are out of sync with the reality of the moment, thereby creating extra suffering for ourselves. In contrast, if we surrender to life’s challenges and bring love and compassion to our experience, without adding any negative energy, peace is more likely to arise.

Committing to living by the truth is like committing to living without fear. Fear is the main reason that truths remain hidden. Bring kindness along with right timing and a sense of what feels appropriate to the situation. Dissolve tension in life and entanglement by opening yourself to a world of possibilities. The benefits are enormous with a new level of freedom and the potential to evolve relationships in positive ways. Some may ease or even come to an end while others may deepen and be renewed to a higher level of flourishing. There is natural beauty to truth well beyond what the rational thinking mind knows!