You can build resilience through assertiveness.  Make a habit of expressing your truths in a tactful manner.  Speaking up honors who you are, what you need and what you think.  This is particularly important in situations where you feel obligated or stuck with no way out.

For example, if a situation arose which required more time and energy than you have available, you could speak your truth in several different ways.  You might say:

“I would really like to help out but I just can’t.”

“I can help out tomorrow afternoon, between 2 and 4 o’clock.”

“I can only help if I get someone else to take over my other responsibilities.”

Using ‘I’ statements allows us to maintain healthy boundaries for wellness.  If we maintain awareness over our energy levels and what is most important to us, we remain stronger and more able to endure subsequent challenges.  Hence, we become more resilient in life!

Here is an interesting way to build resilience that can also be fun.  Express your feelings through a creative mode.  This can be something that you are already well versed in or something new that you have never tried before.  You might journal, write a letter, compose a poem or piece of music, paint, build, sculpt, whittle or carve.  Maybe you will reorganize a closet, create a new recipe or something new out of miscellaneous materials around your home, allowing the project to take on a life of its own.  Working with your hands is therapeutic as it focuses your mind on something other than the problems at hand and allows intuition and insight to arise.  Physicality is powerful since it releases tension within and smooths out the rough patches in life.

Some of the greatest artists in the world have created their best works during dark periods in their life.  Beethovan and Van Gogh are two examples of people who used adversity as a springboard to greater creativity.  You do not need to produce a work of art but only to express yourself.  The magic is in the process and no one knows their capacity for expression until they try it.  Turning negative energy into a creative endeavour can be a very gratifying experience as it offers the power to lift moods and yield new perspectives.

Mind Master is proud to announce this month’s featured workshop on Self-Mastery.  What is self-mastery and what does it comprise of?  According to psychologist Carrie Barron, author of The Creativity Cure, self-mastery is a ‘positive form of self-control’.  In the context of mental fitness, it involves a high level of self-awareness and sound choices for continued wellness.  Knowing who you are and what you personally need in order to live well forms the basis of self-mastery.

While being true to yourself is key, self-mastery also involves compromises without losing yourself.  Adapting to changing circumstances while maintaining healthy boundaries are excellent skills which we can refine throughout our entire lifetime.  The bottom line is honouring and trusting yourself.

Join this 2-hour workshop to build awareness on the essentials of self-mastery and begin your journey towards greater self-reliance.

“One can have no smaller or greater mastery than mastery of oneself.”- Leonardo da Vinci

Build resilience by working with limitations.  If the setback involves some sort of loss, be creative and conjure up ways to achieve joy and success in spite of the loss.  Losses occur in varying degrees, from temporary and minor to permanent and significant.  Oftentimes, losses feel much larger at onset.  Put the loss into perspective and find ways to work with it and around it, while not allowing yourself to feel overly discouraged.

Action trumps emotions.  Take a proactive approach to wellness and shift your mind towards a ‘can do’ attitude.  Ask yourself, “What can I do?”  Be realistic, but also do not underestimate your capacity.  It is said that we all have unrealized talents waiting to be discovered.  Be open to possibilities and you will gradually discover a whole new perspective on the situation while bouncing back in a timely manner!

Resilience is a desirable quality that can be learned.  It involves bouncing back from adversity in a timely and positive manner while not allowing yourself to get bogged down by discomfort and pain.  Resilience allows you to return to your natural state of mental wellness in spite of setbacks.  There are a number of strategies we can employ to build resilience.  Today I will discuss one strategy which involves managing bitterness.

Adversity is an emotional journey.  It is easy to become embittered when we experience setbacks in life.  Embrace the bigger picture and put your situation into perspective.  Realize that you are not alone and that there are many others in this world who have endured worse.  Find inspiring figures whose stories humble you and use their lessons as catalysts for positive change for yourself.  Shed victim status and take control of your life by making wise choices that serve your best interests and helps you move forward in life.

In the last five posts, I discussed different ways in which we can respond to change.  These include seeking knowledge, striving for ideals, relinquishing to the flow, avoidance, and taking control.  Remember that no one method is better than another for achieving desired outcomes.  The particular circumstances and personalities involved are unique for every person and situation.

The key to success is awareness of your habitual responses and knowing the variety of ways you can respond.  Develop a repertoire of responses and consciously practice them in your daily life. Opting for another approach may well be the best decision you make in responding wisely to change.

One other way that we can respond to change is to take control and work positively with the change.  For example, if you suffered an injury and were no longer able to do a physical activity you once enjoyed, you might seek another activity that is equally satisfying.  Making the most out of the situation can be a rewarding and enlightening experience, especially when you open yourself to all the possibilities.  The key to using this method successfully though, is knowing what you can realistically control and what you cannot.  Seeking to control aspects of your life that are beyond your control can be a frustrating and futile experience.

Another way that we can respond to change is to avoid it.  We may choose this method for many reasons, especially if we perceive there is a great deal of effort involved.  Changes can be uncomfortable and life is often easiest when we can stay within our familiar routines.  Although avoidance allows us to stay in our comfort zones, it is seldom without effort.

Avoiding change involves resistance at some level and maybe even fighting back.  We may rebel or steer away from change by remaining closed to new ideas and experiences.  When we do this, we run the risk of becoming stagnate in life and not evolving with the world around us.

Another way that we can respond to change is relinquish to the flow and yield to the greatest need.  For example, if a family member became ill, you might adjust your routines to help care for that individual.  Although self-sacrifice is honorable in certain situations, be aware of giving too much since you risk alienating your true self.

There are generally five different ways in which you can respond to change.  In my last post, I discussed one way which is seeking knowledge.  Another way that you can respond to change is to strive for ideals.

For instance, if your job or relationship was no longer satisfying, you would look for a new and better one.  Although this approach may provide short-term relief  and in some cases, long-term resolve, beware of using this method as a habit since it risks long-term dissatisfaction in life.

In my next post, I will discuss a third way to respond to change, which involves relinquishing to the flow.