Imagine yourself being being confident and peaceful in situations that triggered shame in the past. Imagine holding a strong desire for mutual respect, honouring both yourself and the other person. You might say to that person: “Something doesn’t feel right about this conversation. Could you tell me what you mean?” or “I’m bewildered by what you just said. Can you share what your intentions are?” or “I’m feeling hurt right now and need to leave. I’d like to connect later and continue this conversation. Are you okay with that?” Standing up for yourself and initiating change is an empowering technique that helps to release shame.